You know, sometimes you just need to write things out. Now, I once heard from someone that they don’t read these things that I write out because they’re too long. At first, I was really bothered by this. However, I realized this is a huge blessing. I can write whatever I want and nobody will read it because of the length. It’s a win for me.

This month marks a pretty big change in my life and no matter how many years pass, the emotions and memories are incredibly prominent. It’s almost as if it’s burned into my eyeballs, the brand of what once was still engraved into my soul. The thing is, I don’t know what to do about it. Around this time, is usually when I go through heavy phases of self doubt, loneliness, anxiety, depression, and overall feelings of being a garbage human being. It really sucks as each time I feel like I’m over things and I am fully recovered and ready to take on the world, the memories go “sike” and kick me in the nuts. It’s a fantastic way of living and it’s like Christmas, except the gifts are on fire and I’m constantly on fire and my skin is melting off and I’m in Hell.